It was a beautiful day today. =) The weather was nice, the sun was bright and smiley, and so was everyone I saw... (maybe cuz school's now OVER!) hehehe... But aside from the fact that school's done and over with, I was happily surprised with all my friends having a nice lunch with me! Thanks Wuss, for setting it all up! 真係難為你要帶我去UT Bookstore to 消磨時間!!! At least you got yourself some nice and cheap notebooks! hahaha... And you too, Cindy! =) Thanks for answering MY QUESTIONS! hahaha... you can't lie if your life depended on it *sigh*... You guys are the best!

And to BP, "BRAIN", Cloudy, Ah Suk, Son, and Ren who took the time out of their busy, busy schedule to make it to the last lunch I may possibly have during my U of T career. Thank you so much... it really meant a lot to me, and put a real smile on my face for the entire day... (yes, as opposed to the "fake smiles" that Cindy was talking about today!) After lunch, we all went our ways to class... Bryan, Cindy, Ren, Wuss and I went off to CH for stupid bio, while Hobs went to some class at GB, and Son to hers... BP and Cloudy went their ways since poor Cloudy got ZERO sleep last night =(! Don't get sick now, Cloudy! =)

After half an hour of copying notes that I have ABSOLUTELY NO clue about, we were dismissed... and I left my umbrella in CH! >.< Thank goodness for that second time that I went to look for it, and I FOUND IT! YAY! But it's okay, even if I didn't find it, I won't be too upset... I'll just have to get a new one! 舊o既唔去, 新o既唔o黎! This saying goes for ALOT of things! Gotta find some SINCERITY! And where can I find this?! hahaha... 遠在天邊, 近在眼前! Someone's gotta listen to 仰慕者!!!hehehe...

Later that day, Wuss, Cindy, Hobs and I walked around AIMLESSLY (once again!) and ended up to the only place (apparently!) where Wuss can get a card for a baptism! hahahahaha... Yes. Eaton Centre. Well, at least I got my book! My chick book! 30% off! Niiice!

I saw someone today... someone I didn't really want to see though! hahahahaha... Nothing, I felt nothing. That was it... I hope THEY'RE happy together! hahaha... (granted that they ARE together!) hahaha... They would make a nice couple. Drive each other insane! hahahahaa... Wish you all the best!

Have you ever looked at something, and thought of it to be nothing out of the ordinary? And then, to suddenly see things in a whole new way? It just gets better everyday because you discover new things, and takes you by surprise.  Well, recently, I've been having those sorts of revelations.  It's really quite interesting, and they actually make great "day-toppers"... hahaha... errr...

That's why I've always TRIED not to have expectations.  As you can see, the key word there was "tried".  At the same time, it's hard NOT to have expectations.  Without expectations, there are no improvements.  Or are there!? dun-dun-DUN! haha...

On a completely different topic... I think I've grown so much in the past... oh, I'd say, 3 weeks or so? SO much. More than anyone could imagine.  We, as humans really procrastinate a lot, don't we? (*couwussgh*) Not until we're put on the spot, and have no where else to run, do we actually face our problems.  A lot of that has been happening lately.  I was put on the spot to either grow up and deal with the conflict, or to be ignorant and disregard the situation.  I chose to deal with it.  Well, only because I had to deal with it for other people too.  And for the first time, in a VERY long time, I felt like I was finally "useful".  I still can't believe that I got through it... haha...But it's not like I've underestimated myself either.  I believe I can do a lot of things, it's just that this wasn't one of them.  There are plenty of wounds, but they'll heal with time.. =)

Another thing that I wanted to write about was something that I read on a bulletin board while taking the bus to school.  I never got a chance to actually post it, but I guess I'll do that now! =) Somewhere, it said, "Prayer should be a first response, not a last resort".  And if I could tell you how much that meant to me, well, I would. But some things are pretty indescribable, and this is one of them.  There really is ^Someone^ watching over us. =)

On my ride home tonight, I picked up a "24 Hours" magazine, and was reading it on the subway. One of the articles caught my attention:

"Birth Order Behavior"

Middle Child
- acts out more than siblings
- resentful of spot in the family, hand-me-downs
- more attention-seeking
- black sheep
- personality often forms in contrast to their older siblings

(Taken from 24 Hours, Vol 1#75)

This stuff is pretty on the nose, if you ask me! I like the second last one though, "black" sheep... hehe...

Well, it's not that funny, really, but...

I thought of more things to describe myself... you know, things that have arisen due to the fact that I'm the middle child, and well, quite frankly, a spoiled bitch.  ("brat" would've been the term that I would've used if I was still in highschool, but I'm in Uni now, so I might as well be a "bitch"!) hehe...

3.) When I feel that I'm right, I speak with confidence. And though it may seem intense or whatever, I mean no harm! (don't worry, I'm not going to bite!)

2.) I don't feel that I should ever have to just "do" what other people want to do; and my reason: 'CAUSE I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT! (hahahaha!)

1.) Basically, just don't argue with me. I'm always right.

There we go... A little description of ME! =)

Have a nice day!

This has GOT to be the funniest and weirdest dream ever! No, no more losing teeth! It was a cat fight! Meow!!!  And, yes! I was in it!!! Hahaha… Guess who it was with!!! Guess!!!

I woke up this morning with something piercing into my finger.  When I woke up, I realized that I had been the one shoving my nails into myself! @.@ It was a funny dream!  Okay, here goes…

It’s a snowy day, and I was at the dental office, working.  It felt like a late, Friday morning, and all the receptionists were nowhere to be found.  I sat around until they came back out from lunch, I suppose, and neither of them looked too happy.  While I was looking on to see what my co-workers were doing, suddenly, the time passed quickly and it was Saturday!  Okay, well, I’m SUPPOSED to work on Saturday, so I took my seat at my place.  And for some other reason, I got up, walked down the dim corridor, and turned into one of the dental rooms.  I sat down and was looking at some charts, and suddenly… WS appears!!! Nooooooo! Except, it wasn’t really WS, but I recognized it was her… Instead of a really thin, looks-like-she’s-gonna-be-blown-away-by-the-wind girl, she was in a full-grown body! She had shoulder length hair, that had some volume, and well, the attire wasn’t exactly *rooster-crowing” either! Hahaha… I was surprised.  She walked in, and I greeted her.  Then, out of the clear blue sky, she started hassling me! Giving me a hard time about my efficiency and productivity in the office! Grrr! Nobody criticizes how I work!!!! NOBODY!  HOWEVER, I did not want to deal with her petty annoyances in the office in an unprofessional manner, so I ignored her.  Smrtness!

But she didn’t give up! She kept trashing about how she was a professional, how she was making more money, how she had a husband and family, and put simply, how she was better than me! In ALL aspects! So I yelled at her and told her to stop bothering me, otherwise I wouldn’t be, *ahem*, courteous to her.  So she continued to badger me, and started shoving me too! *Gasp!* NOBODY pushes me! So I started to push her back, and well, that’s how the whole cat fight thing got started. It was like, fighting with my sister! I’m trying to get her to go away, and she just keeps coming back… Oh, you know what? Like a Weebles-Wobbles!

I don’t really remember what else happened, at least not in sequence. At some point, I looked out the window, and in the midst of falling snow, there were two cars that were two cars that were sitting parallel to each other in a “head-to-trunk” fashion. The doors off each side of the driver’s side had been sliced off, and there was a commotion outside about the traffic. 

I went outside, and jumped into my car, and that’s when I realized that WS and I had been the ones to start the jam-up in the parking lot outside the dental office! We had some sort of a chase down in our cars! >.< I think!  I got out of the car, and walked over to the two guys who looked furious inside their cars, and told them that WS and I would be responsible for the damages.  I gave them my registration information, and I called WS (who was standing around, trying to look hot for the boys) over and hollered at her to cough up her information too.  She hesitantly did it but then, she tried to come after me about it!

Suddenly, the scene changed, and we were no longer in the parking lot.  We were standing around in some lobby, (as usual) and just chatting.  There were about 6-7 people there, and I know for sure that Leo was there… hehe… But I don’t remember any other faces.  So, we were talking, and I was telling everyone about my WS dilemma, when from around the corner, she showed up! She walked towards us, and proceeded to throw more slanders while standing behind MY friends.  She was scared! BITCH! Hahaha… err… that’s to the one IN the dream! O(0^_^0)O

Anyway, as she passed slowly beside me and tried to attack me from the side, Leo stood in front of her, and told her to back off! Aww… Thanks Ah Goa! =) But she tried to get past him, and slap me! I caught her flailing arms in time, and had my nail jabbed right into her arm while I tried to hold her steady.  She continued to squirm (as always! Hahaha!) and that’s when I woke up, realizing that I was actually jabbing my nail into my own finger… >.<

I’m POSITIVE that a couple of you will find that quite amusing =)

Last night's dream was certainly familiar.

According to www.dreammoods.com ....

To dream that you have rotten or decaying teeth, forewarns that your health and/or business is in jeopardy. You may have uttered some false or foul words and those words are coming back to haunt you.

But according to Aisling Dream Interpretation...

Dreams about teeth falling out are quite common and can mean one of two things. The first is to do with  having children. (Animals carry their young around with their teeth). This type of dream can be triggered by a number of things.

·         Approaching menopause and therefore losing the ability to have children

·         A physical problem leading to an inability to have children

·         Not feeling capable of raising a child

·         Your children are ready to 'leave the nest'

·         Wanting a child but your partner doesn't

The other thing it can indicate is that you are in a situation where you cannot assert yourself. For example, if you work for somebody who is overbearing and your right to be assertive is not catered for.

Uhhh... so what could it possibly be? For some reason, I have this sort of dream alot... I wonder if it's my obsession with teeth, or just the nightmare of working at the dental office =P hahaha...

I'm feeling really crummy today =/ But I don't know why. Herbert says I'm PMSing... hahaha... If it's a continuous cycle, then aren't girls ALWAYS PMSing?! hahaha...

I've also been listening to a lot of the older songs... Songs from more than 2 years ago.  The feelings that tag along with each song came rushing back, and well, it's making me miserable.  But I'm still listening to it... hai... so lor lai jeen.

Okay, maybe not miserable, but really... contemplative. And I hate this... who actually likes to think?! Why can't we just live the same way we breathe?! Just do it unconsciously! Nobody asks why we breathe, we just do it! Don't get me wrong, I'm not questioning why I live, I'm just...

Listen to me, I'm just blathering. When do I EVER make sense? I can't finish anything in life... can't even write a half-decent journal entry, for crying out loud!

There are just some things that are better left unknown. Sometimes, I bring it upon myself and make myself miserable. Why do I do this? I don't know! =P I just have a tendency to keep reminding myself of things that make me upset, and I drown myself in these sources.  Nice. This is what Christmas is all about.

So there are things that I'm not supposed to know. But I SOOOOOO want to just come out with it, and admit that I know it. However, it wouldn't be wise to do so. =P It's eating me up inside, so I'm just going to speak of it here. At least I can vent a little =).

I don't like being responsible for my own actions. Never did, and never will. I feel like I lose myself when I'm obligated to consider the consequences before acting on it.  I know it sounds stupid, and I know I'M stupid for saying something like this, but hey, this is who I am, right?! =P I like to be able to say and do whatever I want because I want to. I mean, don't you ever feel like you're so restricted and confined within certain boundaries because you've reached a certain age, and certain things are expected from you? Isn't it great to be 4 again, and to just roam free without having to justify your actions? I would love to be 4 again.

I went to Flora's Christmas concert last night.  It wasn't all that fancy, but it's such a Kolbe production. It was great =). I remember helping out in grade 7 and 8 for our productions... Joseph, and... the New Christmas Story =P (I actually don't remember what it's called, but whatever) Anyway, it was so nice to see Mrs. Murphy again. She still looks the same as she did when I was in grade 1. =)

Ahh... Grade 1... it was nice.

I'm just rambling now. I'm jumping from one topic to another, and nothing makes sense. See? THAT'S what I miss! hahaha... I miss not making sense.  Sure, I STILL don't make any sense, but, at least I wasn't judged as someone who couldn't put their thoughts together at age 4! Now, I'm held accountable for everything! EVERYTHING! That's no fun! I don't know what I'm talking about. I don't even know why I started to write an entry. I THOUGHT I had a point of writing this. Evidentally not!

Okay, I'm just going to end this incessant bs-ing now... I clearly have gone wacko, and need sleep =P hahaha.. good night everyone! =) See you tm! =)